“Things can get better, relationships can be repaired, hope can be restored ……”
– Tara Fields
Praise for THE LOVE FIX
“This book is filled with hope, positivity, and all the tools you need to help your relationship to thrive.” —John Gray, PhD and author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
“An essential read for anyone in a relationship. No matter what the state of your relationship you will find tips and strategies in The Love Fix to enhance it, and maximize your own happiness in the process.” —Louann Brizendine, MD and author of The Female Brain and The Male Brain
“Tara Fields has three decades under her belt as a couple’s therapist but unlike most of her brethren, also has had a vast experience in the media. So she knows how to communicate. And you are the beneficiary. That’s only one reason why this is the best relationship book I have ever read. It is wise and modern but most importantly, refreshingly objective, down to earth, direct, and practical. This is a must-read.” —Dr. Dean Edell
“Tara Fields has combined the best of cutting edge thinking in the fields of holistic psychology, mindfulness, and couple’s therapy to arm readers with the skills that will bring forth change and real transformation. A useful guide for both clinicians as well as couples and individuals who strive for healing change.” —Ronald Alexander, PhD, MFT
About the Book
Renowned relationship therapist Dr. Tara Fields reveals the five most common conflict patterns couples fall into and the steps they can take to find their way back to a happy, satisfying relationship in her new book from HarperCollins, The Love Fix: Repair and Restore Your Relationship Right Now, published in September 2015.
All couples argue, but how do some couples get here, to this point that seems like no return?
Licensed marriage and family therapist Dr. Tara Fields has spent over twenty-eight years working with couples. What she learned was that there are five common conflict patterns couples fall into: The Parent-Child Trap; The Blame-Shame Spiral; Come Close, Go Away; Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3; Growing Apart. She also discovered three steps to getting past having the same fight over and over again and moving on to building a relationship where you each feel heard, understood, respected, and loved. In The Love Fix, Fields shares her tested and proven tools and guidance to help build stronger relationships, including:
Insight from real couples who have repaired their relationships
Self-assessment quizzes to get to the root of the problem
Practical 3-Minute Fixes you can start using immediately
HEARTwork exercises where you’ll dig deeper to reconnect.
The Love Fix will also help couples explore the fears and unrealistic expectations that turn fights into never-ending cycles and will teach you how to create the opportunity to get in touch with both of your needs. It’s never too late to reignite your passion and restore the love between you and your partner. Figure out what you’re really fighting about and start enjoying a happier, stronger relationship today!
The number one question people asked Siri in 2017 was ,"How do I relax?"
Men tend to be champions at taking a time out. Most women find it challenging to surrender their care-taking, multi tasking, and often co-dependent role and simply REST!
Check out Martha Beck's very doable prescription:
Warning to all those who think that resting is out of the question when you’ve got goals to achieve! Last June, I began getting an insistent message from a variety of sources telling me that the time has come for those who wish to heal the world to paradoxically move forward through rest. I have suspected this for several months, but I wasn’t sure quite what this meant or how to do it. For me, rest has usually meant working (playing) until my eyes crossed, then collapsing into a coma for a few hours. Then, just when I needed the information, a teacher appeared in the form of Dan Howard, a wonderful Team member who spends his life developing and teaching a technique he calls “intentional resting”. In a few minutes, Dan took me through some basic resting exercises, which seemed similar to other relaxation exercises, but for some reason created dramatically different effects in my body and mind. We’ll walk through one of these exercises in a moment, but first I want to say that using Dan’s resting techniques consistently has suddenly increased my ability to manifest the things I want to experience. In that sense, I have come to believe that resting deeply and deliberately is more than a nice idea. It is powerful magic! Here’s your first intentional resting exercise: Step One: Scan your body and find an area where you’re holding pain, discomfort or tension. For a few seconds stop reading this and imagine all your attention flowing into this stressed out part of your body. Allow the sensation of discomfort to grow until it fills your awareness. Then come back. Step Two: Repeat step one, but this time, silently give your stressed out location the suggestion, “relax.” Then meet me back here. Step Three: Note any changes that occurred in your stressed out area in response to the command to relax. Now, return your attention to that spot and this time mentally give it the invitation “rest.” Continue to invite the area to rest for at least 30 seconds, then return back here. Step Four: Notice any changes, brief or lasting, that accompany the invitation to rest. Common experiences may include a sense of softening, or melting, diffusion of energy, lessening of stress symptoms, or nothing at all. No right or wrong answer – just observe. Step Five: Send your attention into your stressed out area once more. This time, slowly switch back and forth between the words relax and restNotice any differences. This is the basic format to achieve resting as opposed to relaxing. The two are not identical. If you felt a positive response to the word rest, try scanning your entire body while slowly and gently stating “I am resting for my feet now; I am resting for my legs now; I am resting for my heart now;” and so on. Put special attention on areas that are in pain or in distress. Then you can begin applying rest to non-physical aspects of yourself. Try stating “I am resting for my fear now; I am resting for my perfectionism now; I am resting for my troubled past now; I am resting for my future now.” Then choose one thing you are trying to manifest into your material experience — good health, a relationship, more money, friends, whatever. Spend 30 seconds resting for these things: “I am resting for the friends I am about to meet now; I am resting for my bank account now; I am resting for my good luck now.” As simple as this exercise obviously is, I have been flabbergasted by how powerful its effects can be. Not only have I been able to reverse minor infections in my own body, but the people and things for which I rest have been responding in ways that are simply too improbable to be coincidence. Whatever it is you hope to attract, add a little extra twist by resting rather than forcing the result. ... See MoreSee Less
In 2018 I am going to increase self care by watching less news, spending more time with friends, less time working and getting a massage at least once a month. So far so good! I 'd love to hear yours! ... See MoreSee Less
Happy New Year! May we put the previous year behind us and manifest a new year with hope, joy, restoration . From my mouth to G-DS ears... Oy!
My New Years resolution, to save my sanity and maintain my peace is to watch less news and work towards cutting the cable cord with Comcast! Any tips,success stories or advice for achieving the later would be appreciated. ... See MoreSee Less